Mortimer's Mom

the post I didn't want to come back for

at 4:30 yesterday afternoon, after a 6 year battle,
 the last 14 months of which were hard fought,
 my mother finally allowed herself the rest she so deserved and left us. 

My mother was a force of nature. For many years, this meant that we could not get along.
 But the day she became a grand-mother, so far away in China, we put all our differences aside,
 and we found our common ground. All the kids things I know about being a mother, I learned

them from her. Some of the things I do I also do because she didn't to them. But I appreciate
that, because all she ever cared about was that we be happy.

From her, I get many of the traits that make me who I am:
my creativity, my sense of style, my need to constantly over-do everything,
my stick-to-ivness and ability to achieve whatever I set my mind to. 
That's exactely how she was.

She didn't see me turn 40. I know that was what kept her going, because she was 34 when her own mother died, and that was one of her regrets, that my grand-mother didn't see her turn 40. 
Somehow, I'm going to think of something special in the next few months, to make
her really proud.

Seven

Dumpling turned 7 today. She had her first ever sleep over yesterday.

 

She is stunningly beautiful and super intelligent. She does struggle to read and to keep her composure, but when it's a good day, it's a really good day. She is hilarious and keeps us on our toes in many many ways.

To my Dumpling, I love you so much and I am so so very proud of you.

it's been 3 years (and 2 days)

since this georgous little girl joined our family.

  Sorry I'm a couple of days late, things are still craptastic around here.

5 years ago today

Believe it or not, it was 5 years ago today, in Nanning, that I met Dumpling and became her mom. She didn't get to meet her dad til 2 weeks later, but we still celebrate May 31st as her adoption day because he was there in spirits.

It doens't seem possible that it's been 5 years. She is such a grown up young lady. She is an incredible artist and a budding singer/actress (we tried so hard to keep her form HSM, she became a Hairspray fanatic instead and does a killer Tracy Turnblatt). She is now (finally!) a great eater and is very interested in cooking and baking and helping in the kitchen.

Most days, she is a fantastic big sister, though she is quite devious and can manage to convince her little sister to do all kinds of things she knows she shouldn't be doing!

Of course, on a day like today, I want to celebrate all that is wonderful about Dumpling. The truth is, it took a lot of work and patience and sometimes tears to get to this point. There are days when I just don't know if I will ever truly understand her. But we have persevered and all of us together, we are a family.

if you scroll down this page, you'll find my entry from 5 years ago ( I seriously need to import that diaryland blog!). Apparently, I didn't write anything down on our first anniversary, but here is year 2, year 3 and year 4

and tonight, we continued our tradition of taking a picture every year in the dress that I wore 5 years ago in China. When she is big enough, Dumpling will start wearing it.
  

Right before bed, we read Happy Adoption Day, a book Dumpling received as a baby git from our friends Susan,Gord and Cara-Li. Cara-Li is 1 year older than Dumpling and from the same orphanage. S and I became friends online and then in real life and now, 5 years later, we see each other regularly. As a matter of fact, CL and G came with us to the movies yesterday morning. So when I read the book tonight and pointed out the inscription to Dumpling, she was very pleased and expressed genuine gratitude for their friendship and the special bond that we have formed with that family.

I have a closet and other sundries

Once upon a time, I really wanted to take the roof off of my house and put it back at a different angle so that we could have a walk-in closet. Thus ensued the planning, then the decision to move to The House, which of course didn't work out. Back to planning, and a the last minute, contractor problems kept us from taking off said roof. Well about 7 weeks ago, a different contractor with a very different, very scaled-back, non-roof-removing plan and we have new stairs to the attic, a very funky, though not totally completed master-bathroom and I have taken over my husband's side of the closet.

Here is my closet before. Yes, I only had the one side of this IKEA PAX cupboard...

   

And here it is now.... I have taken over the entire thing.

 

Sorry, Something wonky happened with the picture.... but you can see the dresses are no longer scrunched up 4 per hanger, and the pants have room to breath, and the jackets have their own little rod.... To do this, I had to kick my husband's clothes out and into his new cupboards in the bathroom.

Behold the entrance from our bedroom, formally the door to a 2x2 cubby under the stairs:

 

and here are shots of the bathroom. We are missing a mirror and light fixture, along with two boxes on either side with shelving. and the glass shower walls. but otherwise, it's done and I love it.

       

In non-closet related updates, if I were to tell you what happened to us in the last few months, you would not believe me. Those of you who know can back me up on this... it's truly not-believable, in a not-good way. We have dealt with store robberies, cancer, home-IVs, ER visits, iron-infusions, and the terrible unexpected death of a close family member.

Somewhere, in the middle of all this, literally in the middle, with Daddy on home-IV and Mommy getting iron treatments and grand-ma starting chemo and our entire family in deep mourning, Dumpling turned 6. And put the facts together and asked us, in the middle of her birthday dinner, if the 6th anniversary of her birth also meant that is was 6 years ago on that day ther her mommy in China left her....

Somehow, we still managed to have a good time and celebrate this huge milestone. My baby is 6.

 

Yes, i realize that I am frighteningly pale. That was after one iron infusion but before my impromptu visit to the ER....