Mortimer's Mom

Cleaning, Hooking and other weekend pasttimes

What's your idea of the perfect Sunday Morning? Waking up at the country house, lounging about with your children over a warm cup of coffee, enjoying the fresh country air... Don't I wish!

We packed up the kids yesterday and headed for the Kibbutz of the North for the first time since Spring. I was hoping we hadn't been invaded by either bugs (last year, we got thousands of ladybugs) or vagrants. The house was still there, but man was it filthy! So after being woken up BEFORE 6 am by two wild girls, and having a luke-warm coffee from a somewhat clogged espresso machine (mental note: make sure you soak the nozzle if you don't visit often), I set about to clean the house. People, I used Murphy's Oil. And I vaccumed. And I did the stairs with a sponge, on my HANDS AND KNEES...... I know! you are shocked! My kids were pretty shocked too!!!!

Saturday, we vegged out and did nothing. The kids watched newly purchased movies (Return to Neverland and Shark Tales) and I became a hooker...... as in crochet, more specifically amigurumi..... it's widly addictive. I wrote all about it on Ubercrafty.

I am also mulling over a long post about the state of my blog. Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere, but the departure of my compadre Mrs. Figby as left me pondering my own existance and where I want this blog to go. I'm still mulling it over, expect a serious post this week.

important doll quilt swap information

to every one who has something to do with the Lemonade Stand Quilt Swap:

AT THIS POINT, THE ASSIGNMENTS HAVE BE MADE. I REALISED TODAY THAT ABOUT 6 PEOPLE WERE CAUGHT IN THE SPAM FILTER AND I EMAILED THEM. If you haven't received either a swap assignment OR an email from me today about being caught in the spam filter, then I DIDN'T GET YOUR EMAIL and you aren't on the list..... please contact me ASAP if you feel you emailed me and I didn't get it. I will close this swap tonight at 9 pm Eastern, for good. I am really trying to make sure I didn't miss anyone and went through all the spam folders to make 100% sure.... but at some point, I have to close it and just hope I didn't miss anyone.

If you did get your assignment, you are good to go. Except for one person who was contacted directly with a new partner, everyone else stays the way they are. We are simply creating a Group C for everyone that got missed.

Lemonade Stand Now Open (I'm hosting a quilt swap!)

When life gives you lemons.... host your own quilt swap!

Anyone Can Join, All Skills-Level Welcomed, Might Be Used By An Actual Child, Doll Quilt Swap.

the details are all over at Ubercrafty. If you have a craft blog, or you quilt, or you like me, please pass along the link to anyone and everyone you think might be interested. And you should join. Yes, I mean YOU! and You!

nothing like starting your Sunday morning with a slap in the face

Actually, I didn't. I started my Sunday morning with a very weary breakfast (something is up with my stomach. I spent all day Saturday lying on the couch in agony, but it seems to have passed during the night)

Then I got an email from Alisa, who apparently is also up at the crack of dawn on Sunday. Followed by an email from Tracie, who is REALLY up at the crack of dawn, because I'm pretty sure she's not even in the same time zone. So I was enjoying the little "pings" from gmail telling me I had new messages. It doesn't happen often on the weekends. The third ping wasn't so friendly though...

am a bit shocked that you are in a quilting swap. Isn't this a place where "quilters" swap their work? This is hardly an article of proficient quilting. Quirly & dorky for sure, but not anything anybody I know would want on their walls. Free-motion quilting should not be done by a novice with a plain background where EVERY mis-stitch will show. Consider a simpler approach & sew within your means. 

I'm guessing that jayne@comcast.net is also a member of the 3rd round of the doll quilt swap, otherwise, it would be totally random for her to comment on my last quilt. But seeing as the new round was just announced and we all posted links to our blogs, she must be one of the swappers. So if you are the one sending to her, BEWARE: she expects a REAL quilt, from a REAL quilter. Novices need to apply. Also, to the person who is going to get my quilt, I'm sorry you got me. Apparently, I don't what I'm doing and I don't belong in the swap.  so says jayne@comcast.net

EDITED TO ADD: I'm sure you'll all be SHOCKED that Jayne is in fact not her real name! But because people are idiots and don't understand the basics of IP tracing, I know who Jayne is. And she was even stupid enough to make a comment on her own blog about finding me "odd to be in a swap" and, this is the best part "reserving judgment for now" !!!! Way to reserve judgment there Jayne!

If you happen to  be in the Doll Quilt Swap III, I seriously hope that you are not the person making the quilt for Jayne. But if you think you might be, email me, I have absolutely no qualms about confirming it. I have withdrawn from the swap, because you see, Jayne was going to make ME a quilt! I don't want it.

Who needs 20$ Giraffe Shoes?

When it comes to crafting, I tend to be manic. Do nothing for months, then go completely gaga for a few days/weeks. The arrival of Gigi the Giraffe has launched me into an outfitting frenzy. Behold, Giraffe shoes and elmo-embroidered diaper.

  OK, even I have to admit that "branding" the giraffe's diaper was a bit much, even for me!

And Gigi isn't the only beneficiary of my crafting prowess these days. BB had her first ever school picture today and everything in her closet is either ill-fitting or passed down from her sister. So last night, I let her have at the fabric stash from Super Buzzy, I picked a simple dress pattern from one of my Japanese craft books and here are the results:

  I have to say, the Japanese kids clothing pattern are so simple and sweet, they always turn out stunning. The girls both wore their dresses today (what? You thought I could make BB a dress without making one for Dumpling? Please!)

I also just finished knitting Gigi a tiny giraffe sweater... i think I've lost my mind. Thankfully this time next week, I'll be in Texas, hanging with Shelba and Bobbi Jo and a bunch of other gals heading to Canton.

This is why you need to listen in highschool math

I'm in the middle of preparing the loot-bags for Dumpling's bday party on Thursday (5! FIVE!!!!!) and I want to attache a little paper ball to each. I found the pattern on Heather Bailey's fabulous website. And because I wanted this to go fast, since I have to make 20, I bought a circle hole punch.

She has a fabulous pattern all worked out for a 5inch or 6.5inch FINISHED ball, but I need to scale it to work with my 5 cm punch. I have no idea why size ball I`m going to end up with, but it`s going to be smaller, because my circle is smaller than hers, which is fine.

Here is the thing. I am a math moron. I know my circle is 5 cm in diameter. Which I can work out to have a radius of 2.5 cm, or a circumference of 15.7 cm because the only thing I remember from geometry is C= Pi*D

But now I need to calculate the sides of my triangle. I know it's an equilateral triangle. And I pretty much figured out that inside the big equilateral triangle there are 3 Isosceles triangles with 2 sides of 2.5 cm and an angle of 120...... but I'm stumped! How do I calculate the sides of the triangle, so that I get a perfect equilateral triangle inside my circle?

If I haven't lost you yet and you know how to help me, PLEASE!!!! I tried Google but either the formulas don't work or I'm too dumb to figure it out....

AND THE ANSWER IS:

4.4 cm, which you can figure out by either:

Law of cosines= c*squared = a*squared plus b*squared - 2abCOS(C) so, Equilateral Triangle Side = 2.5*squared + 2.5*squared - 2(2.5)(2.5)Cosine(120degrees)

OR: scale the damned .jpg to 5cm and print it!!!!! thanks OmegaMom for coming up with a solution that was staring me in the face!

Clearly, Mila didn't read the last sentence when I wrote that I was too dumb to follow the formula!!! (also, how cool is that? mila is a former staffer who is sorely  missed now that she is busy doing some fancypants graduate degree in an other town, but still keeps up by reading my blog!)

I'm everywhere today

boy of boy! talk about having a popular day......

color and money

When I get bummed out, like I have been feeling these past few weeks, I take on a DYI project. Feeling frustrated? Bang on something! Feeling angry? Destroy something! Feeling blue and down? Throw some orange and magenta on the walls! Since I have banished orange and magenta from the blog, I decided to throw it up all over the walls of the guest rooms at the Kibbutz.  The details are over at Ubercrafty.

(In case you decide to skip the long narrative over there, let me just point out that those are TWO different rooms! I haven't completely lost my mind!) Also, mom and dad... Surprise! "your" room has been painted!

Now, onto a more serious topic... something that has been on my mind for a long time, ironically, probably since I first blogged about the Kibbutz... Back in the day, oh, 2 years ago now, when we first purchased our cottage, I got a troll dissing me. I don't remember the details, but it was mainly about the size of our second home, and basically, about the fact that we have money and how we chose to spend it..... Since I have been blogging, there have been very few taboos around here. I have blogged about every aspect of my life, my husband, my kids, my in-laws, heck, I've blogged about my period! But for some reason, whenever I blog about something remotely to do with our finances, I thread very lightly..... Even mentioning that we went to China in first class, with paid tickets, not on points, seemed to be taboo.... I didn't want to attract the attention.....

As some of you are aware, a troll struck a very good friend of mind yesterday. No need for links, either you know or you don't know. There was even a second comment about yet another friend's vacations.... The woman is a TRAVEL AGENT! If she's not going to take fabulous vacations, who is? And you know what, even if she wasn't a travel agent......

Here is the thing.... I live a more than comfortable life. We are on easy street so to speak. Why should I be ashamed of that? Why should I not blog about buying a Kate Spade bag, or staying at a 5 star hotel when I travel, in first class? Anyone who has read me knows I still buy my stuff on the sale rack at the GAP because up until I married, I didn't have money. So I do know the value of a dollar. I go to work, I run a company. I could sit at home and go to yoga. Scratch that. I could sit at home and make yoga come to me, like every other yummy-mummy on my street. I could hire a nanny to move in and take care of the children so I wouldn't have to bother with them. But I don't. So when I do go out and splurge on a pair of shoes, or a dress, or a cottage, I want to blog about it. And I don't want to attract the ire of trolls!

My second daughter just started nursery school this year. Same school my first daughter attended, mostly all the same families. But this year, there is a little girl there, the daughter of one of the richest families in the country. A well-known family, a family that has businesses and charities named after them. This little girl gets brought to school every day by her assigned nanny. Her sibling has a different nanny. The nanny doesn't walk over to the school. They are driven, by a driver, who is not assigned to the parents, only to the children. Everyday, I am sort of stunned by it. Not because of the expense, but to me, if you are going to be that rich, wouldn't you want to free yourself up and spend every second you can with your kid? But see, that's the thing... that's just ME! And I'm not going to hold it against them! Are they supposed to apologize for being rich? They are generous, they give away plenty, so who am I to judge? (Though I must admit, watching the nanny and bodyguard/driver go apple picking with the kid was pretty freaking hilarious! I wanted to blog about it at the time, but I realized, it wasn't my place.)

So here is the thing. I have money. Some of my friends have money, some don't. If someone wants to blog about their shoes, their vacations, their handbags, they should be able to, without fear of judgment. Because the alternative is communism... that's the only way to be fair to everyone... yeah, I didn't think you'd go for that......

on a high

When it comes to most things in my life, I am either full-on or completely-off. There is nothing wrong with me (i mean seriously wrong, psychologically) but I definately have highs and lows... I have been in a high/manic/productive phase for a couple of weeks now. It started with the doomed weekend up north, when I found myself with hours on my hands and nothing to do. After sorting through the girls clothes (NOTHING up there fits them anymore!) I came across one of the first fancy sweaters I bought Dumpling. She wore it for her first holiday pictures. It was soooo adorable. But it wasn't going to get worn again and I just couldn't imagine giving it away.. But I AM NOT PUTTING IT IN A BOX! When we met Dumpling, my mom, bless her heart, gave me a giant box of clothes she had kept for 30+ years, all moth-ball smelling.... There was no way I was putting Dumpling in those, though we do have fun playing dress up with the highly flammable polyester couture!

Anyhow, the sweater. It was a sweater. It is now a pillow and a pair of mitts.

  I also made Dumpling her halloween costume this week. She will be trick-or-treating during our vacation to the Happiest Place on Earth, so appropriately, it's Disney TM! Of course, she's still complaining every day that she doesn't have the red hair yet.... I may pruchase a cheap wig, but i am actually tempted to knit her one. I saw a funny wig pattern in Craft magazine a while back and I could totally hack it to make it look more like Ariel, but I'm afraid she'll be too hot.

she is  very stoked about the fin!

  I haven't started BB's fairy costume yet. But I did finally cut into some of my  long-amassed Super Buzzy fabrics and made her a cute little top for school:

  the pattern is from one of my japanese craft books, also from Super Buzzy.

I also made a quick update to Ubercrafty with yet another project I whipped up last week.

Sin

I have made arrangements and I am about to commit what I use to consider the WORST sin against old houses..... We are about to have the trim painted..... I know! I can hear you screaming at the computer! (ETA: I have no problem with white trim... I just always thought the sin was painting genuine vintage oak. People spend hours/days/weeks stripping paint to get back to the wood, why would anyone paint it? Oh. I'm about to!)

here is the deal. The main house color inside used to be yellow. Last year, we had everything painted out Wedgwood Grey (Benjamin Moore), which I absolutely adore and it totally made our house more modern and up to date. But the oak. It's every where. The floors are light blond and all the trim is that orangy-brown that is typical of 90 year old oak. It's nice, but it makes the house look very out of date.

So while we are visiting the Happiest Place on Earth for Halloween, the floor refinishers are coming in and sanding the main floor and the stairs (probably for the 2nd time only, maybe even the first. in some places, there is no finish left at all). But I am having them refinish in a dark brown. Not quite chocolate, but almost. There is actually a band of dark brown that runs in the main rooms, as an inlay. It won't be as dark as that, so we can still see the inlay, but it will be in the same family.

After we get back, I need to find a painter, and we will be painting out the trim, the bannister and the stair risers white. I haven't picked the shade yet, so if you have a good white to reccomend, please do so.

Here is the current look:

this is the type of look I'm going for, but not so traditional. so the bannister will be white as well, and you can't tell by my picture, but my walls are actually a nice dark grey-blue, so it will be a nice contrast.

So yeah... I'm going to sin.....